Someone could’ve warned me. Wk 4: The Wall

 

Quick note from Justin:

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How are your lists coming?

Week 4: The Wall

It was an amazing feeling the day my wife and I finished our son’s nursery. It was the perfect room! Light blue walls, dark oak crib with matching rocking chair; a nautical theme mixed with boats, trains and planes. Shelves filled with books, toys, stuffed animals and endless newborn necessities. It was a beautiful mess! But “someone could’ve warned me” what a nightmare it would be getting it to that point!

Soon after Naomi and I were married, we got started on the proverbial “baby checklist”. One day I picked my wife up after work and we headed to Babies-R-Us to knock out our baby shower registry. Now the thought of taking a scanner, aiming, and shooting at overpriced gifts we didn’t have to pay for, had me somewhat jazzed. Like any “good dad” I planned on scanning every cool baby gadget I could find!

“Excuse me miss, can you please point me in the direction of the iPad’s for dads”, I fantasized before entering the store.

I knew it was a long shot, but have you seen the size of a Babies-R-Us? Surely a place larger than my hometown would possess a hidden gem or two for expectant fathers?!

As we walked through the sliding doors, grinning ear to ear, we headed straight for the registry desk. Now I consider myself a smart individual, and someone with good intuition. But in this instance, excitement and greed overtook my brain and I missed every warning sign. As soon as I saw the lady sitting behind the desk with her bright purple polo shirt, gigantic unnerving smile, and huge “here comes another” eyes, I should’ve known we were in trouble. If only she had been licking her lips and salivating, maybe then my fight or flight instincts would’ve kicked in.

We sat down, gave her all of our information, and in return she handed us a sheet of paper. Now this was no ordinary sheet of paper, it was a list of things; hundreds, maybe thousands of things, all broken up into 12 categories; gear, activity, feeding, nursery, bath, potty, etc.

Our smiles turned quickly into hesitant smirks of holy expletive thinking, “what the **** have we gotten ourselves into.” We decided to start with the feeding portion of the list, for no particular reason other than the fact that it was closest. Standing in front of “the wall” of endless bottles, nipples, and pacifiers, my wife gave me a look I will never forget.

“Are you ok babe?’ I asked.

She grabbed my hand and replied with exactly what I was thinking, “I don’t think I’m ready for this”.

We stood there, for what seemed like an hour, blank stares into a sea of feeding accessories, all shapes and sizes, different colors and brands. “Did I miss something in my home economics class?” I thought to myself.

I snagged another purple polo wearing baby genius and asked, “So you don’t just stick the card in their back to feed them?” Like always, my comedic stylings were not appreciated by anyone but myself. The employee, after the worlds longest eye roll, began rambling on and on about various methods of feeding and the importance of choosing the right bottle for your baby. My wife gripped my hand tighter and it was in that moment that I decided to wear the pants in our relationship, for once, and lead her… right out the doors!

I drove us to the nearest Barnes-N-Noble to buy every parenting book we could find. We called our moms on the way for some helpful advice, but apparently things in the 80’s and 90’s were a tad bit different and we’re all products of BPA bottle poisoning. At Barnes-N-Noble there were a ton of books for woman who were expecting, but for men… just one. Now if you’re an expectant father reading this, don’t rush out to try and find this book. I can sum it up for you in one sentence, “Do what your wife tells you, because you have no idea what she is going through.”

After weeks of reading books that only added insult to injury, and kept us reliving the painful memory of our Babies-R-Us “register and run” incident. My wife and I decided, screw the books, screw Lamaze class, let’s wing this whole thing and if we can’t find something, we’ll do what every normal American does… we’ll Google and go to Target!!!

“Someone Could’ve Warned Me” WARNING of the week:

You can read countless books on parenting, you can take every class they offer, but nothing can prepare you for the bundle of joy that won’t stop running around in circles with their shirt over their head, as you’re trying to put them in their high chair just for them to yell, “I hate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.” Don’t waste your money. Consider yourselves warned.

Fitness Update

This week didn’t end quite the way I wanted it to. I had big goals of reaching below the 250lb mark, but fell short. It was a tough week. Physically, I actually felt pretty good in regard to my injuries, but it was torture because I missed a training day.

Sometimes life just gets busy; with a little one and family obligations, I saw time run out. I also had a run in with my wife’s grandparents cooking. Someone could’ve definitely warned me about them. Someday I’ll write an entire blog dedicated to their lives, because they deserve one. They are amazing people with an amazing story, escaping North Korea and making their way to America, it’s truly inspiring.

Now, being a 6’2” white boy from Montana, I am a little out-of-place with them; not only because they come up to my hip, but because I don’t speak a word of Korean so having a conversation can get a bit tricky. But they always find a way to make me feel very welcome.

Usually by feeding me… and feeding me.. and feeding me more.

The thing about my Korean in-laws and most Asian cultures is that food is king. And if you’re a guest you’re expected to eat. So as I tried to stay away from the rice and just take a little bit of meat, they weren’t having it. Within minutes an entire plate of fried chicken, and plates upon plates of Korean BBQ were in front of me……and…..I couldn’t be disrespectful.

As I sat there contemplating how I was going to explain this to Justin, they told my wife that they had made it all special….. just for me.

In the end I chalked it up as my cheat day, a really big cheat day, and got back on track the day following. After three weeks of being on the Paleo diet, the greatest thing other than the weight loss, is I never feel uncomfortably full, or bloated, like I did that day. When I’m hungry I snag some good clean food and that’s how I roll now.

I am beginning to understand that this whole process is a lifestyle change and something I need to carry with me always if I want to stay healthy for my family. When I let Justin know I didn’t reach my goal and had only lost 2lbs, he told me exactly what I needed to hear.

“Losing 2lbs is losing 2lbs any way you look at it and that’s an accomplishment.”

Justin also challenged me to find one thing that I can start doing every day, and one thing to quit doing every day to help me along this process. So here is what I’m starting with.

Every day I am going to stop looking in the fridge and pantry in envy of the things I wish I could eat. And for the thing that I am going to start doing every day; I’m going to spend more time in thought and prayer. With all the craziness in the world and negativity, I am truly blessed with an amazing wife, beautiful son, and incredible family that fully support me. God is good and I need to be better at letting him know how thankful I am. Have a great week everyone! Challenge yourselves to start and stop one thing this week. I did.

PALEO RECIPE

Paleo Comfort Foods Cookbook

Breakfast Egg Muffins
Ingredients:
1 T olive oil
1 Large sweet onion, (finely chopped)
1 Green bell pepper, (finely chopped)
1 Red bell pepper, (finely chopped
1 Jalapeno pepper (optional)
12 Large eggs
½ tsp black pepper
¼ tsp salt (optional)
1. Preheat oven to 350°F
2. Saute’ onions in olive oil over medium heat for 2-3 minutes. Add peppers and continue cooking for another 2-3 minutes.
3. While peppers are cooking, whisk eggs in large bowl.
4. Once onions/peppers are cooked, removed them from heat and let cool for a few minutes. Dump egg mixture and stir well, while adding salt and pepper.
5. Coat a large muffin pan with olive oil spray. Using a 1/4-cup measuring cup, fill each muffin cup.
6.Place in oven for 10-15 minutes. Remove them one the tops get high, fluffy and golden brown. Pop them out with a butter knife or spatula.

Plan Ahead- To make this really quick and easy, saute’ veggies the night before. Keep them in the refrigerator and simply stir them into your eggs when you’re ready to make the muffins.

Variations- For some added protein, saute’ some of your favorite sausage, ground turkey, or beef, and add to the egg mixture. ½ pound- ¾ pound should workout great.

Cheers,
Tyler

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